"Step away from the MDF and put down your stencil kit," order self-proclaimed design gurus Colin McAllister and Justin Ryan of How Not To Decorate (HGTV Canada). The pair have, they say, saved hundreds of homes from style purgatory with their show and their eponymous follow-up book (Time Warner, 2005). We asked them to share how-tos for transforming the hellish into the heavenly.
S@H: Share some of the worst design nightmares you've encountered.
JR: We've gone out of our way to track down the most hideous houses in Britain. We're the saviours of style, and we're saving the world one house at a time. And let me tell you, we've seen it all. We've seen houses built without foundations that have literally fallen down. One woman fell through her living room ceiling in a bathtub!
One of our pet hates is carpet in the bathroom -- and believe me, we've seen lots of that, darling. Why do we hate it? Carpet is a home for wee-wee, a breeding ground for infectious germs, and an ecological quagmire, not to mention a design disgrace.
S@H: You've also seen lots of peach, or should we say "the shade of Satan"?
JR: We've witnessed some of the most atrocious colour combinations. Red and lilac, or green, black and red all in the same room. And yes, peach -- lots of it -- a colour that's the work of the Antichrist.
S@H: Why do you think there's so much bad taste in the world?
JR: People just don't think. Their interiors are hastily planned and end up being nothing short of repellent. Our message is to take more time and plan, rather than rush headlong into what ends up being dodgy design.
S@H: Doesn't it seem paradoxical that such decorating no-nos still prevail when there are so many resources now available to people -- like your show and book?
JR: Too much choice can be bewildering and befuddling. That's why we're always promoting the KISS principle: keep it seriously simple. The worst thing you can do is to try too hard; that's exactly how people end up with a collection of trolls and wood panelling in their sitting room.
CM: Most people adopt a higgledy-piggledy approach. They see a sofa they love on a show and a carpet in a magazine, and buy them. The result is a room that doesn't work together. If they used the same approach to dressing, they'd show up at work in a tutu, wellingtons and a crash helmet.
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